Bad news for those of you who are looking for something funny to start the week. Let’s see what are we going to talk about today: it’s seems that man who drink Coke are less fertile. An unlucky old men from America woke up to find out he no longer has a penis and the fattest man alive is (finally!) getting married!

Size does matters! Manuel Uribe, World’s Fattest Man Alive is getting his tuxedo done cause on 26 October he’s getting married! The lucky(?!) is Claudia Solis, an average woman who has been near him for the past years. In fact, she helped him lose about 250 kilos. The Mexican Manuel weighed 560 kilos.

The happy couple haven’t decided where are they going to held the religious ceremony because the future to be groom can’t leave the bed.

Rumors has it they will get married in bed and thus skip the party and move on straight to the “honeymoon bed” and adventures.

I wish them all the best!

Image credit: vetvrji.com

Butt Bra! The perfect push-up for your ass! It seems that Jennifer Lopez is very proud of herself. Because all women want a big, firm ass just like Jenny from the Block has got. Well ladies, now you can have it. Because from now on you can lift up your posterior with the incredible Butt Bra! (I’m not sure how it’s called, it’s easier for me to just call it Butt Bra!). Hooray! It’s time for all the fat asses to come out to light and enjoy the sun!

image credit: the dailymail.co.uk

Coke kills sperm cells! Two scientists from Harvard (so, they aren’t any scientists, they are scientists from Harvard, got it?!) discovered that all sodas with Coke kill sperm cells. Apparently Coke makes sperm cells blow up. Now, I hope you’re not going to rush into it and use Coke as a contraceptive method.

The two Harvard scientists were awarded with the Nobel prize for most weird discoveries.

Cook your testicles! Actually, not your testicles! A Serbian cook launched his new recipe book where you can learn how to cook all sorts of things using testicles. Interested? Pizza with ox testicles, omelette and many other … delicacies! Um … it doesn’t sounds that yummy for me!

Total circumcision! Phillip Seaton, an American from Kentucky decided it’s time for him to have a circumcision. He’s 61! The unlucky thing was the fact that after the surgery he realized he’s missing … his penis! Dr. John M. Patterson decided to cut off the man’s penis because he had cancer. Of course Phillip is convinced that the doctor is not telling the truth and he decided to sue the doctor who deprived him from his beloved penis!

Well, Kentucky man you are just a bit lucky. A few years ago, in Romania, a man in his 30’s woke up without his penis because Dr. Ciomu mistook the surgery and cut off the man’s sausage. Ever since, whenever a doctor chops off his patient, we have a saying: “I guess he met dr. Ciomu”.

Sandra Meiser, age 26 from Germany was recognized by a witness while she was on the verge of another bank job due to her big … ass!

The German big butt bank robber managed to steal 15.000 euros from a bank in Nerf (Western Germany) by pointing a gun at the bank personnel. Due to the fact that she had her face covered up, nobody could say how the robber looked like. All they noticed was the fact that the robber had “huge buttocks” and “strong hips“.
A few weeks later one of the witnesses was waiting at the line, in the same bank. The 61 years old noticed the same big butt in front of him. “You cannot forget something that big!”, said the man.

He called the police and the suspect was detained. Police recovered a ski mask and a gun from Sandra Meiser. She’s looking at a sentence of 10 years of jail time and the witness received 5000 euros for his good deed.

It pays to have a good memory!

I’ve been busy lately and I had no time in writing too many things over here. Here are some of the latest news (unfortunately, most of them are not happy)

1. Victoria Beckham is a terrible role model! I just hope girls around the world think of Posh Spice as an absolute awful role model and she should not be followed. Look at those shoes! What on Earth is she trying to pull out? That’s not glamorous, that’s stupid! But I guess it’s ok for a person who admitted she had never ever read a book!

Image credit: The Daily Mail

2. Matilda Rose Ledger is now one of the richest kids in Hollywood. The family of late actor Heath Ledger decided to give every penny of their beloved son’s fortune to Matilda Rose, their granddaughter. It’s really a noble gesture coming from Heath’s parents.

Image credit: The Daily Mail

3. The tourists kidnapped in Egypt last week are thought to be fine. Six of the kidnappers were shot to death by the Sudanese forces and other two were captured but there is still no word on the tourists. Let me remind you, 11 European tourists (five Italian, five German and one Romanian doctor) were kidnapped nine days ago in Egypt. The bad guys demanded a ransom of $8,8 million from the German government. The group was kidnapped on a desert plateau famous for prehistoric cave paintings. (AlJazeera.net)

4. The Chinese Milk poison scandal is going out of proportions. Tesco recalled White Rabbit Creamy Candies after it was found they contained a substance called melamine that has harmed Chinese babies for the past weeks. It is the same chemical that has contaminated formula milk in China, causing four babies to die and around 53,000 children to become sick. This is a huge hit for the Chinese government who really tried to make a good appearance at the Olympics, earlier this year. A few years ago, China was a global threat after the bird flu that killed hundreds of people in 2003. It is really strange that Chinese people would kill their own babies and risk losing bilions of dollars from exporting milk and sweets.

5. Google is going to celebrate 10 years of existence this year. And they are offering an award of $10 million for an idea that would help the world. Read more on CNN.com

6. Scarlett Johansson and Ryan Reynolds got married. The two lovebirds got engaged in May and secretely married the other day in Canada. The actress once said that monogamy is “unnatural for human beings”. And yet she married Ryan. Hopefully she passed that “monogamy not natural” period and will be faithful. If not, more gossip news for you

7. Travis Barker and DJ AM (Adam Goldstein) surviver an airplane crash. Unfortunately, they suffered from second- and third-degree burns.

“Since both Barker and Goldstein are in overall good health and didn’t suffer from any other crash-related complications, a full recovery is expected,” said Dr. Fred Mullins of the Joseph M. Still Burn Center at Doctors’ Hospital in Augusta at a Sunday morning press conference. People.com

8. Shia LaBeouf’s conspiracy thriller “Eagle Eye” is on the top of the box office! With $29.2 million, according to studio estimates Sunday, the thriller managed to make more money than “Nights in Rodanthe”, the Warner Bros. romantic drama who gained a total of $13.6 million. I’ve seen Shia in “Disturbia” and I loved it and can’t wait to see “Eagle Eye”.

BOX OFFICE TOP 10
Estimated ticket sales for Friday through Sunday at U.S. and Canadian theaters, according to Media By Numbers LLC.

1. “Eagle Eye,” $29.2 million.
2. “Nights in Rodanthe,” $13.6 million.
3. “Lakeview Terrace,” $7 million.
4. “Fireproof,” $6.5 million.
5. “Burn After Reading,” $6.2 million.
6. “Igor,” $5.5 million.
7. “Righteous Kill,” $3.803 million.
8. “My Best Friend’s Girl,” $3.8 million.
9. “Miracle at St. Anna,” $3.5 million.
10. “Tyler Perry’s The Family that Preys.” $3.2 million.

I really am sick of all the girls and boys who want to be famous but they have nothing to do with music or acting!

1. Look at the Romanian Cheeky girls! For a person who lives in Romania, those girls are a disgrace! They lack of voice, style and they are pathetic! Who gives a damn about their personal life? The Daily Mail gives them to much credit for nothing!

Who cares that Gabriela dumped Lembit Opik? My God, she even uses her assumed pregnancy and had a miscarriage just to get more attention! Girls, go hang yourselves! You are pathetic and you are too blind to realize that!

photo via DailyMail

2. Victoria Beckham. What did she do after getting married to David? All she did was giving birth to their cute babies. But that’s all she did! Musical career? She’s horrible! Fashion? Her style is awful! Gorgeous body? Are you joking? She’s got those enormous boobs but she’s skinnier than a skeleton!

3. Jordan - Katie Price. She’s the wife of singer Peter Andre. And that’s about all I really know about her! Oh, and she has kids. Katie looks terrible, smiles terrible and walks terrible. This girl has no sense of pathetic! Somebody please give her a mirror!

4. Paris Hilton. There are too many reasons why Paris is a wannabe!

5. Kim Kardashian. What did this girl do? She’s got a big butt, but I don’t know anything noticeable about her! Could you help me out with this?

Florina, the 11 years old girl from Romania, who got pregnant after her 19 years old uncle raped her has had an abortion in London, England.

The surgery went fine and doctors told the media the young girl is feeling fantastic. The complicated surgery took place in a public hospital in London and the Marie Stopes clinic payed all the hospital expenses.

At the time of the abortion Florina’s pregnancy was 22 weeks old. She was in her sixth month.

Normally I’m against abortion but when it comes to situations like Florinas’, I have to say : abortion was the only solution.

First of all, she got pregnant after being raped by her uncle. The baby was the product of an incest.

Second of all, she is 11. Florina is a child, she can’t take care of a baby.

The only thing that really bothers me is why didn’t her mother take her to the hospital earlier? A child who’s feeling sick and throws up each morning, faints and feels nausea all day long is clearly not a healthy child. I remember my mother taking me to the doctor immediately after accusing some abdominal pains. Why didn’t Florina’s mother take her to the doctor after the first 1 or 2 weeks after seeing her feeling sick?

It’s so sad that these things happen.

Florina, the 11 years old girl who got pregnant after her 19 years old uncle raped her is going to England. Her mother confirmed the fact that they already have the flight tickets.

Meanwhile, the Romanian comission concluded that Florina can have an abortion in Romania IF she can find a doctor who will go through with the procedure.

In case anything wrong happens during the abortion/mini c-section the doctor is not going to be defended by the whole medical staff, in other words : do it on your own risk stupid, we won’t guarantee for you!

Florina’s parents are decided to travel to England and try to put and end to this unhappy event.

Unfortunately, as far as the Romanian media tells, the British Law says that the girl who got pregnant must be older than 12 years old, which in Florina’s case is a problem. Unless she can find a doctor who will terminate the pregnancy, she’s stuck with an unwanted child on her back and a huge trauma.

Her name is Florina and she just turned 11. She’s was a happy girl right before her 19 years old uncle raped her.

She was afraid to tell anyone about what happened with her but soon she started to feel sick: morning sicks, headaches, she fainted a few times and accused some abdominal pains.

Her parents got worried and took her to the doctor. The medical staff as well as her parents were shocked when the analysis revealed that the 11 years old girl is pregnant.

Only after the pregnancy was revealed the girl told her parents about her mother’s 19 years old brother who took advantage of her.

The boy ran away from home when he heard about the consequences of his “pleasure time”. Florina’s pregnancy is now in the second trimester, she’s pregnant in 21 weeks.

The Romanian media wrote for days about this unhappy situation. Everyone judged the parents for not taking the girl sooner to the doctor, for not taking her to a clinic for an abortion. Florina’s mother said she’s afraid of what would happen to her brother if he gets caught. The media made a big case out of this.

The doctors in Bucharest and Iasi decided to spare the child from an unwanted baby and opted for an abortion but after a week they changed their minds because of legal issues. According to the current abortion Romanian law you’re forbidden to have an abortion if you’re more than 14 weeks old of pregnancy.

Because Florina’s parents and herself do not want to have the baby they decided to go to England for an abortion.

A Romanian woman, Roxana talked to some doctors from the “Marie Stopers” hospital where the abortion will be taking place. The procedure costs about 1.600 pounds.

“I’ve already spoken to her parents and told them what to do. A good friend of mine from America offered to buy the plane tickets. I decided to get involved in this case because all I see is an 11 years old child obliged to have a baby by some stupid rules.” said Roxana

The parents are angry with the Romanian authorities because of the stupid laws regarding abortion.

“We know what we’ve been through for the past month and a half. I don’t want to offend anyone but we’re sick and tired of wandering from one hospital to another. We thought the doctors from Piatra Neamt and Iasi wanted to help us, that they really wanted to do this abortion but the law forbids this because the pregnancy is too far along. What are we supposed to do now? We’re going to England. It will be God’s will from now on. We only care for our daughter’s sake!, said Florin, the girl’s father.

Florina, the pregnant 11 years old girl doesn’t really know what is wrong with her.

“I know we have to go to England, to do some analysis. I’m not afraid, I’ve been through enough hospitals. I don’t know what it means to give birth. All I know is that Adrian (the uncle accused of rape) did something bad to me and I had to go to hospital and visit doctors”, told the girl

Unfortunately, Florina is not the only under 15 years old girl who’s going to have an abortion. Last year only in Romania a number of 535 girls under 15 had an abortion. It’s such a shame that the educational system is not working and that there are no special sexual education courses to teach young ladies how to protect themselves from an unwanted pregnancy.

The abortion issue is now being discussed by the media and the Parliament. Some people hope that the current abortion law is going to be changed because it’s wrong to let a girl have her uncle’s baby who raped her.

Gorgeous Angelina Jolie stated she is very upset over footage of her as a youngster in a drug den in New York. The footage was on the Internet for a while and she thought nobody has any interest in showing them to the wide public.

The pregnant beauty is mostly upset because the footage, which was taken about eight years ago, was publicized while promoting her latest kids movie, “Kung Fu Panda” at the Cannes Film Festival.
Angelina admitted she has taken drugs but she stated she’s clean for several years.

Apparently, Brad Pitt had no clue about the footage. Anyway, somebody hates Angelina so bad he/she wants to destroy her career.
I guess we all had our rebel times and many celebrities have gone wild at some point, that doesn’t mean they don’t have the right to straighten up.

I have nothing to add! These guys have said it all!

I really hope those pregnancy rumors are a false alarm and that the train wreck singer is not really pregnant. I hope she had a big lunch and she’s having a “fast food bump” not a baby bump.